Maybe I'm old school in my thinking that when someone leaves the home or intends to leave they should communicate with their partner, especially when there are kids to care for. My husband seems to think that by doing this, he is asking permission, I disagree.
Take for example this morning. My husband came to tell me that he was going to look at tires. I was under the impression that we were taking care of this when we were doing errands later in the day. Apparently I shouldn't have asked about it because we went from 0 to 100 in 2 seconds. Now to clarify, I did not tell him that I didn't want him to go, to be honest it was fine. I was merely seeking comprehension of a plan change. Before I knew it, he was in a huff walking away from me.
I find myself wondering if it would be this way if he didn't have PTSD. Would it be easier to have a conversation with him about something so mundane if he didn't get upset so fast? So now we're at a stalemate, he is hiding in the basement with his video games while I stew upstairs. I did try to talk to him again after a cooling off period but he's stubborn and didn't want to ease up and hear my side. I realize that I am his wife, not his parent, so why does he assume that he's asking permission and not merely communicating his intentions? Perhaps I need to remind him?
I always ensure that my plan is not going to inconvenience his, I think that it is just a courtesy owed to a partner. Sometimes the timing of my plan doesn't work, sometimes it does. This is just something I do and expect the same in return.
I'll admit, I'm not looking forward to the rest of the day now as this will be held against me and will make for very short fuses.
No comments:
Post a Comment